Pollyanna Rainbow Sunshine, the Zombie Quilter from Hormone Hell

Lyda here.

First, and before I forget yet again, go check out Red’s latest post. She has pictures! A parade! Yarn! Excitement! Hopefully, this will help you forgive my own lack of pics… Should have included Red in the post the other day, too… Sorry, Red. My brains are fried lately… You know we are blaming everything on the Hormones from Hell right now, yes? Okay then…

This weekend was spent mostly sitting on the couch bemoaning my fate  handling some things I needed to handle, and getting ready for and then enjoying having two friends over for dinner.  And also – I hope you are sitting down – QUILTING!!

Yes, I know you are stunned. I worked on both Prince quilts, and therein is the tale.

I spend a lot of Saturday with squares of fabric spread out all over the living room floor, as I played with patterns for the Cosmic Prince Quilt. I finally settled on a pattern that I like, and felt so amazingly accomplished. Especially since I did this while baking a cake, cleaning a bit for visitors, and prepping the chicken for the oven. Also, curled up on the couch moaning from cramps, and watching The Thin Man. There was a long pause in all activity and the movie when Anna-Liza called and I cried on her shoulder  updated her on the Hormones from Hell   talked with her.

When the first friend arrived at my place, the movie had been returned to the library and the other errands done, the cake was cooling but not yet frosted, and the chicken was in the oven. And oh yeah, the quilt pieces were still on the floor. I pinned the pieces together while we talked, and it was done before my other friend arrived.

We had fun – there was laughing, there was wine, there was food: my semi-famous roast chicken, baked potatoes, veggies, and the chocolate cake with ice cream for dessert. My friend brought soy cream to go with the cake. That’s what I said: Soy. Cream. I declined this taste treat and stuck with the real stuff in my freezer. They said the soy cream was good though. Uh-huh, okay.

Sunday, I got up and headed straight for the sewing machine to stitch together the Cosmic Prince Quilt. I was pretty proud of myself, having the Frog Prince Quilt top done already, and the Cosmic Prince all planned and ready to sew.

And then, as I pulled out the Frog Prince Quilt to admire it again…

It suddenly hit me.

Anna-Liza’s boys aren’t babies any more.

They are three and six years old.

This is obvious when you look at the latest pics she posted. Obvious when she tells me about their latest escapades. Obvious when I hear them talking in the background as we chat. All of which I had been exposed to Saturday, ya’ll.

And yet, somehow, this fact as it relates to the Prince Quilts had escaped me until that moment.

I looked at the Frog Prince Quilt top and realized that it was not big enough. It was “large baby quilt” size, not “growing boy” size. I realized that the Cosmic Prince Quilt I had carefully pinned together was the same size. 

Neither of them would keep a six-year-old warm at night. Probably not a three-year-old either.

Curses and swearwords. Tommy the cat was quite shocked by my language, ya’ll.

Now, I am a bit compulsive about how much fabric I buy (having run out in mid-quilt once or twice), so I had plenty of fabric, plenty of extra squares already cut out.

Lots and lots of extra squares.

Then it occured to me that perhaps I had bought fabric with twin-size quilts in mind in the first place. Uh, yeah. Whenever that was. Two years ago?


So, I spread the Frog Prince quilt top out on the floor, and grabbed the extra squares, and laid out extra rows. After much measuring and re-measuring (at this point not trusting myself as far as I could throw myself – which would be about three inches), I came up with an expanded version I like pretty well. It looks good, and does not require me to pick out any stitches. Because this has already taken too long, ya’ll.

I started sewing the new rows, just picking up the squares off the floor as I went. Tommy decided to help by attacking the fabric and moving the squares around randomly. Perhaps he didn’t like the pattern.

I finally pinned the last few rows together and got them off the floor. Probably saved his life. Again.

Apparently he did not get the “Do not mess with the Crazy Hormone Lady” memo.

So… once again, the Frog Prince Quilt is under construction, this time in a more realistic twin bed size. I’ll have to be creative with the back of the quilt, as there will not be enough of the fabric I was planning to use. Guess I’ll punt…

And the Cosmic Prince Quilt… expanding it will change the design I did. So I will basically be starting over. Again. Sigh…

Maybe they can take the quilts with them to college. Maybe I’ll be done by then.

But they shouldn’t hold their breath.

Summary: Still a quilter, no matter how demented.


3 thoughts on “Pollyanna Rainbow Sunshine, the Zombie Quilter from Hormone Hell

  1. annaliza

    HAHAHAHAHAH … HAHA hahahahahah …
    Sorry honey, but it really is that funny … HAHAHAHAHA … I’m laughing AT you not WITH you … hahahahahaha … Yeah, maybe college …!!

    (I know there will be something for you to laugh at for me soon, if there isn’t already.)

  2. lyda Post author

    Oh fine. Fine. My best friend, folks.

    No, it IS funny, really. (Not at first, but once the cursing was over…) No wonder I had so much extra fabric… dur!!

    I expect to make huge errors in my knitting, being a newbie, but this is just embarassing…

  3. Kelly

    You two crack me up!

    Hey Lyda, thanks for the upside to ADD thing. That was really interesting. I’ll have to show it to Bob. Maybe it will give him a new appreciation for my… err… weirdness? LOL!! I totally relate to the Jet Blue dude. I might have to check out one of those books. Oh wait, I don’t read. Ya think maybe a book ABOUT ADD might be something I’d have attention span to read?

    I’ll be thinking about you for all your doctor stuff tomorrow. Hang tough chickie babe!!

    Kelly 🙂


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