Lyda here.
Curses and swearwords!
It’s official. I can NOT count to twenty.
I also cannot understand simple directions.
It seems I’m incapable of performing the most menial and simple of tasks without falling on my face.
Sometimes literally. Ouch!
How many times in one day can one person say, “I messed up, I’m sorry”?
The count goes on… erroneously….
Since I can not count to twenty, I won’t really be able to keep an accurate count, will I?
Calgon, take me away!
“I fancy somewhere sunny.”
Pollyanna Rainbow Sunshine and the Needles of Doom 
But you made it to twenty. I’m in awe.
No I didn’t. I just thought I was counting to 20. I was wrong.
Counting while I’m knitting is obviously out of the question.
Did you make it to four?
While this won’t help your counting, I’m sending sympathetic vibes of wine and chocolate your way.
Hmmm…. wine and chocolate… hmmmm… Thanks, Red, I needed that!
Anna-Liza – What is this mysterious “four” of which you speak?
“One, two, five…” “Three, sir!”
“… Then thou must count to three. Three shall be the number of the counting and the number of the counting shall be three. Four shalt thou not count, neither shalt thou count two, excepting that thou then proceedeth to three. Five is right out. Once the number three, being the number of the counting, be reached, then lobbest thou the Holy Hand Grenade in the direction of thine foe, who, being naughty in my sight, shall snuff it.”