Pollyanna Ponders Becoming a Hooker

Lyda here. I totally may need to learn to crochet. Check this book out! There’s a cthulu – and a pirate – and DEATH. Heh.  And an alien, and a vampire queen, and… and…

And not one, but TWO kinds of zombies! Be sure to look at the pictures people have posted of their cute projects.

And then I wandered about a bit and stumbled into this post and this post. And innocently following the links, I found this weird tomato.

But… but… I don’t know how to crochet.

And I have so many quilts to make. Speaking of quilts, check out these zombie bunnies! Oh, she has cool stuff.  See the quilted skull Loteria card?  And bats. And a bruised heart.

Oh, I just searched for “zombie quilts” and I got this as one of the top five suggestions. Hey, I wrote that! But I digress…

Besides, I can’t learn to crochet. I need to work on my knitting instead. I promised the Resident Sith Master I’d knit him a scarf. Not that he will need a scarf any time soon, but still

But geez… yarn zombies… yarn killer tomato… yarn pirate…

Yaaarrrn.

This feels so… familiar.

When have I had this sense of inevitability before?

Oh, yeah.

I’m going to end up doing it, aren’t I?

How am I going to explain this to my kid?

“Your mom’s a hooker.”

That’s what he said.

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3 thoughts on “Pollyanna Ponders Becoming a Hooker

  1. annaliza

    Knitting Sprite has that book. I actually learned how to crochet as a kid, I just haven’t done it in years … but I will be. It’s easy to learn. Irregular shapes are easier to make with crochet, too, which is why so many toys and stuffed zombies are made that way.

    Reply
  2. lyda Post author

    I did learn to crochet a bit as a kid, I think I got as far as potholders.

    You’re on, Red! I’d love to learn to spin. And I’m sure I’ve got room for a spinning wheel and piles of fleece. If I just move the sewing machine there, and stack the fabric over here, and move the yarn over there, and… Why is the fabric meowing?

    Wait. Where’s the cat?

    Reply

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