Pollyanna Rainbow Sunshine, your Random Weirdness reporter

Lyda here. I just can’t get enough weirdness. And it is Wednesday, after all. But Second Son’s birthday post had to go first. Priorities, ya’ll. And weird. But I digress…

Here’s this week’s

Completely Random Weirdness

1.) Mating animals badger police.

Yes, we’ve got a million of ’em here at Bad Puns R Us.

2.) Fortunately, “Lion of the Sea” was not on the menu. Geez, they weren’t very welcoming. Next time he should bring potato salad.

3.) Stand back! I’ve got lasagna and I’m not afraid to use it!  And she would have gotten away with it too, if it weren’t for those meddling kids!

4.) What’s up with Florida? Dude, the cops don’t care what’s on your five inches. Or your buns.

5.) I know what ya’ll will be thinking once you read this. Ya’ll will be thinking, “When can I too have a bulletproof bra?”

6.) And speaking of pasta and pirates: Important breaking news on the environment, on a t-shirt. Full explanation here. Yes, we were too talking about pirates. Pollyanna always talks about pirates. And zombies. And cake. Oh, digressing again.

You can knit a proper tribute to His Holiness, the Flying Spagetti Monster – three different sets of instructions here and here and here. May the Sauce be with you.

And CAKE!

8.) So, here are the results of the only fair Male SurveyI say “Only fair” because it only includes heterosexual men, for one thing.  And, to go straight to the part we’re all interested, the sexuality results. And the dating results.

Sex: Compare the answers to #2 to the answers to #38. And then look again at the answers to #27.

29% think they can definitely tell if a woman fakes an orgasm.

Guys, I have this bridge for sale…

9.) And here are the results of their only-fair Female Survey. Again, only heterosexuals. So why is there a picture of an almost-nude woman?

And why are there no categories for lifestyle and for money & power? They asked that on the men’s survey. *insert my standard feminist rant here*

Anyway, sex results, dating results.

Sex: 22% say they have lied about how many partners they have had. (Once again, see #27 on men’s sex survey).

But my favorite? #16: 63% of women admit to having faked orgasm (6% say only once… we believe you, we really do).

Dating: See #7 – I have to wonder what that “other” is.

63% of these women have not had a threesome and would not consider it. (The guys will be sad.)

Hum. There may be a meme with some of those questions in our immediate future.

10.) It’s… happening… as predicted by the Ghostbusters in the first movie

Click the link in the last line and you’ll see.

Venkman: This city is headed for a disaster of biblical proportions.
Mayor: What do you mean, “biblical”?
Ray: What he means is Old Testament, Mr. Mayor, real wrath of God type stuff.
Venkman: Exactly.
Ray: Fire and brimstone coming down from the skies! Rivers and seas boiling!
Egon: Forty years of darkness! Earthquakes, volcanoes…
Winston: The dead rising from the grave!
Venkman: Human sacrifice, dogs and cats, living together. Mass hysteria!

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7 thoughts on “Pollyanna Rainbow Sunshine, your Random Weirdness reporter

  1. Marin

    Four out of five women with whom I talk about these things aren’t sure if they’ve actually had an orgasm, but will insist they never faked.

    Put that in your pipe and smoke it, boys.

    Heh. I just had, like, a full-body, five-sense twelvehood moment.

    Reply
  2. lyda Post author

    Red, I thought so too. And so I had to share.

    Marin – They aren’t SURE they’ve ever had an orgasm…? Wow. That’s… just… I don’t know what it is…

    “Smoke that, boys” – bwahahahahaha!

    Was that like a twelvehood orgasm, Marin? Shiny.

    Reply
  3. Marin

    A twelvegasm!

    I figure if you’re not sure if you’ve had an orgasm… you haven’t. “I mean, it felt good and all…” just doesn’t cut it.

    Reply
  4. lyda Post author

    Twelvegasm! Bwahahaha!

    I agree. “It felt good and all…” does not cut it.

    That’s what she said!

    Reply
  5. Anna-Liza

    Then, no. I would agree with Marin that they have not had an orgasm. But geez, why are they not taking matters into their own hands? I mean, cum ON!!!

    See, twelvehood is catching.

    Reply
  6. lyda Post author

    Bwahahahaha! Their own hands… and toys. And have they never heard of experimenting? Fantasizing? Are they just with men who suck? Or maybe the men don’t suck, maybe that’s the problem. (And by suck I mean.. oh, ya’ll know what I mean. Heh.)

    You were twelve long before you met Marin. But her proximity does seem to increase twelvehood in others. She’s a Twelve Magnet – she draws it out of us!

    Reply

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