Pollyanna Passes the Buck

Lyda here. I’m writing this quickly, in case the Cosmic Innernetting connection does not work for long.

Y’all may have noticed that I haven’t mentioned anything really personal lately. I’ve been battling my old demon, depression, and any time I start writing something about my life the post takes a turn for the sad. Not that there aren’t things to be sad about, in the world and in my own life. Not that there’s anything wrong with sad.

It just doesn’t seem to help me to dwell on it too much on the blog. So I haven’t been mentioning the stress and problems at work, the sadness of missing my son and missing my kittens, my weird and annoying physical problems, or the horrors of my finances. It only sounds self-pitying and makes me even sadder.

Sometimes sorrow is all I feel. I’m trying to allow myself to grieve the losses. There are times when I just sob until there are no more tears.

But there are times of hope too. Times when I think about the future not with dread and horror, but with excitement at the possibilities. With only myself to care for, what can I do?

Sometimes I think I can do anything.


Kermit: [singing] Life’s like a movie, write your own ending…
All Muppets
: [singing] Keep believing, keep pretending; we’ve done just what we’ve set out to do, thanks to the lovers, the dreamers, and you!

Someday we’ll find it, the Rainbow Connection…

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5 thoughts on “Pollyanna Passes the Buck

  1. KSD

    Feel whatever comes along. No other way to do it.

    — From one who has been there several times, and, quite frankly, is there right now.

    Reply
  2. Nancy G

    I’ve never been that much of a joiner (or in the “in” crowd, for that matter), but can I hang out with you? This depression stuff sucks even more when you’re by yourself in it. (Not that I would want anyone else to be depressed just so I’m not alone, mind you…)

    Reply
  3. lyda Post author

    Hey, Nancy, we’ll all just hang together – you’re right, it sucks but it sucks more alone than it does together.

    Reply

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